Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I'm up early... well, early for me... after a long night of preparing contest submissions to send out.  I'd hate to actually stop and calculate how much I spend each year on entry fees (although the IRS would probably appreciate that).

In other news, I took a break and watched "The Unborn" last night, which I'd like to go ahead and nominate for Worst Horror Movie of the Past Five Years, and Not in a Funny Way (WHMPFYNFW for short).  It had all the necessary elements, including:

1) A heroine who seems remarkably unaffected by her haunting, an example being that the sudden appearance of her undead brother only prompts her to look slightly pouty and go jogging.

2) An absentee father who apparently goes on a month-long business trip (minus his cell phone and access to email) during what appears to be the prime season for rampant demonic possession.

3) College students inexplicably living alone in creepy Victorian mansions. 

4) The completely unexplained and unaddressed appearance of random creatures--apart from the before-mentioned undead brother--including: a) weird bugs, b) small dogs with their heads upside down, c) some sort of tentacle thing that attacks the heroine through a hole in a bathroom stall... no, really!   

5) No police involvement whatsoever.

6) A college professor of an undisclosed discipline who apparently knows all things relating to the occult.

7) A botched exorcism.

8) Frequent webcam chats about how this whole haunting thing is just SO uncool!

9) Mousy best friend and ineffectual boyfriend whose solution to the possible mental illness and/or demonic haunting of the heroine, coinciding with several murders and supernatural phenomena, is to go clubbing.

10) The following line, meant to imply that the heroine must kill a ghost that a [random gypsy] holocaust survivor tried unsuccessfully to kill once before: "You must finish what began in Auschwitz."  Wait, what?  Talk about a line that could be horribly misinterpreted!

1 comment:

  1. I'm a closet fan of horror movies, and use the "bad" ones as distractions in times of stress (final grading, the holidays, etc...) I will have to add this one to my list.